We’re From the Government. We’re Here to Help.

The state of Florida has a problem.   So-called “pain clinics” have sprouted up like weeds around here.  Apparently, they are little more than drug dealers with an M.D. behind their names.  Anyone can go in and say, “I’m in pain” and walk out with a prescription or…  better yet… a bunch of pills dispensed right there.   Turns out that those same pills can be resold on the street for a handsome profit.  And, from what I’ve heard, the docs do VERY well… to the tune of $50k a month!  Well… we can’t have THAT, now can we?  So, our fearless leaders are gonna do something about it!  But, who’s going to bear the brunt of these “common sense laws?”

Here’s a list of “Pill Mills” in Palm Beach County. Yippee.



Our omniscient state government has decided to crack down on this.  Yippee.  And, like in most other cases, it’s the law-abiding citizens that get the shaft.  They’re going to make it MUCH more difficult for legitimate prescriptions to be obtained.

Not always.

For many years, I have not owned a traditional prescription pad.  I laser-print prescriptions on blank paper.  Very efficient and very legible!  But, to “combat the bad guys,” the state has decided that I now have to print prescriptions on “counterfeit-proof” paper.  Yippee.

I got a letter from the Florida state board informing me of this new law TODAY.  The law went into effect on July 1st!!!  Last week!  Yippee.  So, if I wanted to write a prescription for a patient TODAY… I can’t do it!  I have to order this special counterfeit-proof paper (at 10 cents a sheet) from a state-approved supplier.   Hmmm…. wonder who pushed this legislation through???  I wonder which lobbyists were involved??

Doctors will no longer be able to dispense controlled drugs at their offices.  Furthermore, those doctors who do dispense must dispose of their inventory by July 11th.  They can turn it in to local law enforcement and “abandon them,” or they can return the drugs to the wholesale distributor.  Otherwise, officials will SEIZE them.

According to my letter…  Beginning on July 5th, law enforcement agencies will enter the business premises of the identified dispensing practitioners and “quarantine” the inventory on site.  Again…. I got my letter TODAY… July 5th.  I wonder if anyone else go their letter in a “timely manner?”

No big deal for me as a dentist, so far.  I don’t dispense.  But, maybe a big deal for the good physicians out there.   If I was a dispensing doctor, I could have officers storming my place today, essentially without warning.  That’s not gonna be good for business at the legitimate doctor’s offices.  🙁

More regulation.  More feel-good legislation that does more harm than good.  Yippee.

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2 Responses to We’re From the Government. We’re Here to Help.

  1. In my loverly, debt-ridden state of Cullyfornia, Physicians, Chiropractors, AND Dentists can indeed prescribe pot.

    I wasn’t aware of the last two professionals being on this eclectic list, until on a fine, sunny, Tuesday afternoon late last year, I walked down 2 blocks from my office to get a great vanilla latte from this pretty cool ‘Wiki-tiki’ coffee place. (Starbucks and The Coffee Bean were both over a mile away, so I didn’t have a choice in terms of walking). I hadn’t been to this particular establishment for over a couple of months, so I was a tad surprised to see a new sign in front of it that simply said: ‘The Coffee Joint’.
    Great! I thought, I can still get my vanilla latte fix, right? I also noticed there were some funky, psychedelic curtains over the front door, which was also locked. What the hell, I thought, a coffee shop closed, and during lunch time?
    Ya gotta be kiddin!

    As I started walking away, I heard a buzz, and the door opened. I timidly walked in, expecting some sort of well, ‘coffee joint’, but a 20-something woman with several nose-rings and multiple tattoos, asked me what I wanted. I said, “I’m probably at the wrong place, but where in hell is the ‘Wiki-tiki’? Out of business?”
    “Yup” she said, and promptly corrected me that this was the ‘new and improved’ Coffee Joint, with the emphasis totally on the latter name.

    Silly, naive me, but this was the new medical pot dispensing place, incredibly within a block of my office (admittedly in a high-end area of the San Fernando Valley). And no, I told her all I STILL wanted was a cafe latte, decaffeinated, s’il vous plait.

    She laughed, and I promptly told her that smoking or prescribing pot was about the last thing I’d want to do on the planet. We talked a bit more, and that’s when she told me that yes, 2th docs can legally prescribe in the state.

    Yeah, just what I need… a smoke-filled room smelling with marijuana to sedate the patients (and the staff, and the doc? 🙂
    Darn, and all I wanted was a hot drink containing gobs of that sugar-free splenda to tide me over into an an afternoon of fillings!
    PS: a few months later, the ‘Coffee Joint’ was closed down. Of course, the main problem in all this is my need for a decent afternoon latte fix within walking distance. Ah, the problems in surburbia.

    • The Dental Warrior says:

      Great story, Ed! I’ve always said that if I start serving alcohol at my office, I’ll change the name of my practice to, “Mike’s Bar and Drill!” 🙂

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